Hall of Fame Jerseys You’d Never Wear: Part 2-NFL

This week, 4HT has been looking back at hall of fame athletes that made a pit stop in the twilight of their career.  These guys, despite being a legend in their respective cities, decided to have a fling elsewhere, and the results were catastrophic (for the most part).  Yesterday, we looked at NBA hall of famers, and today, our focus shifts to football.

oj

Some players are currently not in the HOF, but will be at a later date

OJ Simpson—>49ers

All legal issues aside, The Juice was one of the greatest running backs to ever play football.  His 2,000 yard season with Buffalo helped set a benchmark for the rushing accompishments, and his respective organization showed their gratitude by trading him to San Francisco years later after an injury.  With all the great Niners of the past, I doubt anyone is sporting a Juice jersey. 

*For the record, I don’t recommend wearing ANY OJ jersey at this point.

Joe Montana, Marcus Allen—>Chiefs

Speaking of great Niners, Joe Cool was the single-greatest Super Bowl performer ever.  The guy was a gamer, and ALWAYS delivered the goods on “Super Sunday.”  Sure Montana took Kansas City to the 1993 AFC Championship, but you won’t see too many “Arrowheads” paying tribute to number 16….err 19.

Marcus Allen was, quite simply, the backbone of the Raiders offense.  We all know Bo Jackson had a few productive years, and dominated Tecmo Bowl, but nobody meant more to that team than Allen.  When the L.A. icon (U$C guy too) left for divisional rival Kansas City, he basically traded his silver and black for an unwearable red and yellow.

montanaallen

Two west coast legends meeting in a Midwest backfield

Franco Harris—>Seahawks

The Immaculate Reception is reason enough……Franco (or you) in a Seattle jersey makes no sense.  Harris, a Penn State grad, helped the Steelers win 4 Super Bowls, and cannot go anywhere in the state of Pennsylvania without legions of fans crooning for an autographed Terrible Towel. 

franco1

This jersey would be the shit if it was #55, and said Bosworth on the back

Joe Namath—>Rams

Broadway Joe in a Rams uniform is blasphemous.  Namath cemented his whole mystique/legacy in New York, and the propensity to be somehwhat of a party guy and self-promoter helped his legend grow out of proportion in the Big Apple.  This is exactly why he showed up drunk to a Jets game trying to kiss Suzy Colbert years later.  Stay classy Joe.

namath

I want to kiss…..nevermind…..I could care less about the Jets struggles

Johnny Unitas—>Chargers

Unitas playing his final season in San Diego is something alot of people forget about.  The old gunslinger should have retired in Baltimore, and Peyton Manning needs to quit being such a pussy and wear black high tops every game.  Pay the fine, and move on.

unitas

Powder blue high-tops aren’t nearly as effective

Emmitt Smith—>Cardinals

Think about it: If Emmitt didn’t desperately hold on for two extra years in Arizona, we could have been treated to his shitty football analysis at a much earlier date.  Forget it, go buy a Smith Cards jersey, I don’t care.

emmitt

“My gamebreaker go to Wes Worker.”  Well said Emmitt

Thurman Thomas—>Dolphins

The Thurminator leaving Buffalo for a bitter divisional rival has all the ingredients for a textbook unwearable jersey.  Dolphin fans wouldn’t touch that jersey with a ten foot pole, and I think we all know what a rabid Bills fan would do to one.  He should have just retired when Buffalo said, “Sorry, we’re too broke to pay one of the best players in our franchise’s history any money.  Would you be opposed to playing for free?”

thurman

Would college teammate Barry Sanders have done this? 

Bruce Smith—>Redskins

Like his old teammate Thurman, Smith ascended to god-like status in Buffalo.  When the sackmaster left for D.C. , the result was failure, something anyone involved with the Bills organization is quite used to.

bsmith

You were better on Tecmo Super Bowl Bruce

Deion Sanders—>Ravens (and Redskins)

Neon Deion was a scoundrel, jumping from contender to contender during the prime of his career.  When the magical ride ended, and nobody was calling to set up workouts, an almost 40 year old Sanders weaseled in with the Ravens due to a friendship with captain Ray Lewis.  His production was far from “neon,” and not too many will remember Deion’s curtain call in Baltimore.

deion

Falcons, Niners, Cowboys: OK          Redskins, Ravens: NOT OK

Earl Campbell—>Saints

The Tyler Rose literally IS the state of Texas.  He’s big, he’s tough, and he’s downright scary.  Campbell will forever be cherished for his amazing career at the University of Texas and with the Houston Oilers, but not so much for his season with the Saints.

campbell

We’ll start the bidding at $2.11

Cris Carter—>Dolphins

Carter had the best hands of any receiver in NFL history, and this is NOT negotiable.  I absolutely hated his guts when he torched the Bears with amazing circus catches, and then dove into the turf before anybody could stick him.  The crafty little shit playing for Miami was an ill-fated decision, and tarnished his spotless seasons in Philly and Minnesota.

carter

Carter making an amazing catch in Miami, and then running out the back of the end-zone to avoid contact

Jerry Rice—>Seahawks (and Broncos & Raiders)

When you’re talking about the greatest player of all-time at the wide receiver position, and said guy has multiple unwearable jerseys, you know he held on WAY too long.  Some may argue that a Rice Raiders jersey is ok, but I’m going to say no.

rice

Nobody’s gonna touch your records Jerry, now go away

Tony Dorsett—>Broncos

Trading in the star of “Big D”  of Dallasfor the putrid “Orange Crush” of Denver is not a wise move, but it sucks when you don’t make the choice yourself.  Dorsett, one of the best Cowboys ever, was traded to the Broncos for his final season in the NFL.  TD gimped out only 700 yards that year, but don’t expect any Bronc fans to be toting around #33 jerseys anytime soon.

dorsett

Is that Bobby Humphrey???

Eric Dickerson—>Falcons (and Raiders)

Mr. Rec-Specs didn’t know when to quit, and gutting out 3 extra seasons was crippling to his status in “greatest running back of all-time” discussion.  Surely he isn’t top 3, but many could (and do) argue that Dickerson deserves to be in the top 5-7.  Sadly, it’s hard to believe this after seeing those last few hundred carries.

dickerson

Figured you’d like to the see Rec-Specs and Jheri Curled Dickerson pic more than the old, bald, and bitter Dickerson as a Falcon pic

Art Monk—>Jets  (and Eagles)

Monk was, is, and always will be a Redskin.  Hogettes will never turn their backs on him, and it is common to see #81 jerseys scattered throughout Fed Ex Field on Sundays.  Art’s detour with the Jets and Eagles wasn’t a big deal, but don’t expect anyone to be sporting those bad boys.

artmonk

The Rich Kotite/Bruce Coslett Jets unis rock

Warren Moon—>Seahawks (and Chiefs)

Moon was a legend in Houston, and the Red Gun offense coach Jerry Glanville innovated with the Oilers would not have been nearly as effective without Moon fumbling one out of every three snaps.  All joking aside, old #1 was ok in Minnesota, but the show was over in Seattle and Kansas City.

moon

What’s that over there?  Oh my career….

Rod Woodson—>Raiders (and 49ers)

Hot Rod was enshrined into the hall of fame for his accomplishments with the Steelers, but earned his glory with the Ravens by winning a Super Bowl ring.  With the Ravens exempt in this case, stay away from Raider and Niner jerseys that are for #26.

1582297BB001_Raiders_Bronco

Should’ve called it quits after the SB victory Rod

Randy Moss—>Raiders

While we’re ripping on the Raiders, here’s another.  Moss jerseys were selling like hot-cakes when he was traded from the Vikings, but the actual amount of jerseys in circulation that people are actually wearing nowadays is somewhere between 1-4%.  99% of these people are probably at a casino or strip club right now.

moss

Oakland isn’t exactly the most suitable environment for a guy like Moss

James Lofton—>Raiders (and Eagles & Rams)

Sure we could say that a Lofton Eagles jersey is more unwearable than a Raiders one, but we’re on a roll here.  The HOF receiver had his best years in Green Bay and Buffalo, so a #80 Raiders jersey (that says Rice or Lofton) is out of the question.

lofton

As Mick said to Rocky, “Stay down kid…stay down.”

Tim Brown—>Buccaneers

Finally, a Raider that went somehwere else to look stupid.  Brown had a great career catching passes in Oakland, but finished up with Tampa Bay in less than wonderful fashion.  Buc fans are better off getting a Joey Galloway jersey.

brown

Gotta love the taped fingers

Reggie White—>Panthers

The Minister of Defense dominated opposing offenses with the Eagles and Packers, but White’s time with Carolina displayed a veteran who was out of shape, and seen better days.  Coming out of retirement to put on Panther black and blue wasn’t the best.

reggie

Should have stayed retired Reggie

Brett Favre—>Jets (soon to be Vikings)

The biggest attention whore in our planet’s history just couldn’t quit last year, so he singlehandedly harpooned the Jets playoff chances in the last 4 weeks of the season.  Favre needs to go away, and go away now.  The only glimmer of hope I have for a Brett comeback with the Vikings is that the Bears will have two chances to end his career once and for all.

favre

Favre is gonna need some serious Vicodin after that hit

Feel free to comment on anyone you would have liked to see included (Csonka—>Giants, etc.), and come back for Part 3-MLB

 

 

12 Comments

  1. Comment by HUH? on June 19, 2009 9:58 am

    Sorry but you are so wrong on Marcus Allen. I am not a Chiefs fan, but he was absolutely loved in KC, I’m sure KC fans will have no problem sporting that.

  2. Comment by Mr88 on June 19, 2009 10:53 am

    Wearing an Alan Page Bears jersey would cause me to spontaneously combust……….

  3. Comment by Mike on June 19, 2009 11:34 am

    As great as Montana was I believe Bart Starr has to rate as the best championship game QB ever. He won more NFL championships and had a higher playoff QB rating than anyone other quarterback. And don’t start with the “Super Bowl” crap. Super Bowl is just another name for the NFL Championship. 9-1, 5 NFL championships and a rating over 100. Maybe Joe was second best. And he never pulled a Favre even when he was being eased out.

  4. Comment by Steelhead on June 19, 2009 11:40 am

    Mike,
    Notice it says, “Super Bowl Performer,” but I totally agree it is important to look at the big picture. The only people who seem willing to acknowledge that football existed before SBI are us Bear and Packer fans……

  5. Comment by Joe on June 19, 2009 1:00 pm

    I’m one of the biggest Brett Favre haters on this planet. I’m glad to see that you called him an attention whore, but why stop there? The dude is an egotistical, narcissistic a-hole that cares about nothing more than getting in the record book. Remember this: “What are they gunna do, cut me?” What a classic line Brett. Go play some stupid two-hand touch football down on some Mississippi farm in your straight cut Wranglers. Brett Favre…Real. Huge. $%^.

  6. Pingback by Hall of Fame Jerseys You’d Never Wear: Part 3-MLB | Four Horsemen Tattoo - Confessions of a Sports Fanatic on June 22, 2009 5:30 pm

    […] week, 4HT started a mini-series looking at jerseys of NBA and NFL HOFers that people never wear.  Today, we take a look at a few baseball legends who donned […]

  7. Comment by Rykerw1701 on August 25, 2009 1:20 pm

    Fun article. Honorable mentions go to some near HOFers. Ken Stabler also left Oakland to look foolish elsewhere, with the Houston Oilers.

    Archie Manning, who’s greatest accomplishment in football is really his kids, fled the Saints to go to Houston and Minnesota.

    Troy Vincent looked great for the Dolphins and Eagles, but less so for the Bills and Redskins.

    And the biggest one left out above, who is a HOFer, is Deacon Jones. He was traded by the LA Rams to the Chargers, then parts of him made it to Washington.

  8. Comment by FACE on September 17, 2009 4:00 am

    Dorsett wasn’t that bad in Denver. That team blew.

  9. Comment by FACE on September 17, 2009 4:03 am

    And Deion Sanders was a nickel back in Baltimore – and he made some plays at his old age.

  10. Comment by FACE on September 17, 2009 4:04 am

    Duane Thomas was a bust out with San Diego after Dallas

    Larry Csonka was spent before he left the Dolphind for New York

  11. Comment by sixburgh on December 30, 2009 10:42 am

    As an avid jersey collector for many years, many of these jerseys are actually pretty sought after. I myself own a BAL Deion, a team-issued CAR White jersey, and would be happy to own quite a few you have listed. Mitchell & Ness charges $300+ for a KC Montana, they make a new run every so often so someone’s buying them. Same goes for the Namath and Campbell ($200+).Woodson made the PB as a Raider. Any #80 SEA jersey that isn’t a Largent is unique, pretty ugly, but unique that Rice had the number brought out of retirement and Largent was the only one to ever wear it.
    A DENVER J.RICE #19 would have made more sense.
    Here’s a few more: (some of these I would wear)
    M. WEBSTER – CHIEFS
    L. CSONKA – GIANTS
    L. ALWORTH – COWBOYS
    A. PAGE – BEARS
    M. DITKA – EAGLES
    H. ADDERLY – COWBOYS (though,did win SB)
    a few non-HOFers
    R. JACKSON – 49ERS (won SB)
    K. GREENE – PANTHERS
    C. DOLEMAN – 49ERS
    H. WALKER – EAGLES/GIANTS/’90sCOWBOYS

  12. Comment by Jim on May 11, 2012 10:33 am

    @The Article Writer

    How can you rag on Rod Woodson, saying he needed to quit after his SB win in Baltimore? In 2002 with the Raiders, he had 8 INT’s, ran 2 back for TD’s, and was named to his 11th Pro Bowl and his 6th All-Pro honor! He was a beast in Oakland that year!

    Now, his last year there was not so great but Rod had some worse years when he was even younger in Pittsburgh.

    I should also point out, that at 41 years old with the Seahawks, Warren Moon threw for over 3600 yards (back when not every QB was throwing for 4,000), and put in 25 TD’s, AND made the Pro Bowl for the 9th time!

    So, overall good article, but some of it is way off.

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